Sunday, June 6, 2010

Aqua Baby

Every time I see this polish it reminds me of this one time my step chitlins were dragging me around a gigantic, upscale and crowded mall desperately looking for the perfect items that would make them too cool for school.  Along the treterous journey we passed a kiosk that encircled an infant getting it's ears pierced. 

Of course you could barely tell what the mound of red flesh and clothing WAS, because the child's face was so contorted with agony and confusion it was nearly impossible to tell what this woman in the kiosk was holding. Unless of course you walked up and got uncomfortably close to the action.  This little bunda was merely weeks old as anyone could tell. The proof was in the size of the GATHERING of onlookers that had formed around the event.  A glorious heard of horrified people stood and stared, mouths agape, as the young mother clasped the arm of a jewelry clad toddler with one claw, still managing to hold the squirming, SCREAMING infant getting pierced with the other.  I myself was a few yards away holding on to one of those huge ceramic pots they use as trash cans to be more presentable,  bent over at the waist exploding in waves of uncontrollable laughter.

Anyway the reason this polish reminds me of that scene which I of course will remind you I found totally hilarious, was that I have never seen so much liquid come of out a child in my life. Hence, Aqua Baby by China Glaze.
Look I just could not help but to laugh.  It was the onlookers that did it, with their higher than mighty stances and upset faces.  Their stupid fanny packs paired with straw hats and sunglasses on the top.  I had to laugh or I would have combusted under the weight of the rediculousness ok. I dont really give a crap about the baby, yeah its sad and all, but not as sad as a mob of morons taking the time out of their petty little routines to get pissed off at a total stranger.

Love, MM

P.S.- Look, the baby's freakin ears were gonna hurt for like 15 mins at the most so back off. GEEZE.


  1. When I was about two I insisted adamantly that I NEEDED to get my ears pierced. My parents tried to talk me out of it bit apparently my fat stubborn toddler mind was set.

    They managed to pierce one of my ears before I started screaming my lungs out and throwing a fit.

    I had one pierced ear until I was about five and finally got the other one done XD

  2. OMFG, your story is hilarious. And I think the baby was a bit young. But really, when they're that young, they probably won't remember it and it's gonna heal super quick.

  3. Aqua looks way blue on you! Much more green-leaning on me.

    I'm completely against messing with your kids like that. What does it say about people? You want your kid to wear earrings like some kind of Paris Hilton-a-like or other pointless celeb? WHY??? You want them to look trashy?

  4. As usual, your story is entertaining and disturbing at the same time. Personally, I don't think infants should get their ears pierced. I see it as a rite of passage. My niece was SO proud when she got her ears pierced at 7 years old, and we all made a huge deal out of it. I think it taught her that a little bit of pain can have huge benefits!

  5. I had my ears pierced practically as soon as I popped out. It's a cultural thing, from where I'm from. Lol at the story.

  6. Lol, what a scene. I think it's unfortunate that any piercing is done in a setting like that, especially with a piercing gun. If they'd gone to a piercing studio it would have been so much easier on them and the baby! /bodymod rant

    Love that color!

  7. Love the color! And yeah, I have mixed feelings about infants getting piereced. I get that sometimes it's a cultural thing, but I presonally would never do it to my kid. To each his own, I guess.

  8. Someone once told me that young kids aren't supposed to get their ears done because the correct spot on the lobe changes when they get older? Poor baby.